The Flowers at our first annual "Healing the Holidays" service
We are getting close now. Christmas Eve is just around the corner. Like many congregations we have two services. The first is at 5pm and features child musicians and readers. The 7pm also has some child readers but is usually quite a bit quieter. Both end the same way. Carols are sung and candles are lit. It is pretty and will be just as "Chrismassy" as it always is, even in the midst of the monsoon scheduled for the holiday.
However, we have had some other moments in our congregation that have brought out that same spirit. Advent services have been well-attended. The annual pageant was a particular highlight. Also, over the past couple of days we participated in two extra-curricular events that are important ones for our congregation.
The first of these is a new tradition. Donna Vuilleumier, our Affiliated Minister whose regular ministry is in hospice, officiated a "Healing the Holidays" service for those people who were experiencing a sense of loss of emptiness during this time. We were a small group, but a good one. I knew all of them. Stephen, Donna, Rebecca, John, Lori, Sue, and myself were all that could make it. But it was important. We are a community that cares for each other. We reach out both in times of celebration and in times of grief.
The other was our annual caroling trip to the local hospital. We have been doing this for around six years. It was started by my then-assistant Matthew Carriker. He has moved on but the tradition continues with his various successors doing much of the planning. Each year we look forward to it. We mess around with the caroling books (our original list didn't have enough "secular" carols). We recruit pretty much the same kids to play instruments. Basically we carve out the time and count the days.
Then we hustle to the hospital to sing. People show up straight from work in their office clothes. My son rushed there with his uke in between track practice and his band concert. Others have a more leisurely approach. Someone (I don't know who and it may be more than one someone) makes sure we have enough Santa hats.
We have been doing this long enough that I, at least, can mark the time by noting who has shown up on which year. Who will be back next year? Who will only now be missed and remembered? As someone whose profession takes him to the hospital, I also remember my visits there without the carolers. Friends and congregants who have stayed their and recovered. Some, too, who did not. The kids get bigger, we get older. There are new folks who arrive and family visitors from out of town. "That was the year when..."
This event matters. It matters as much to those of us who participate as to those we are there to help. It helps us define who we are as a community that is there for each other as well as for the world. On Sunday after church, an older member of the congregation took my arm to tell me that she still remembers the time when we visited her in the hospital and sang as one of her favorite holiday memories. She cannot make it to caroling herself but the fact we do it still brings her joy. This is wonderful. As with the Healing service, we do what we do for those present and those not present.
To me this is Christmas. The other stuff is nice, too. However, in the end the best of the holiday is about building community and demonstrating our love and caring for others. Maybe the stress of the season even helps us in a weird way. It makes us mindful of how everyone is doing. It makes us aware that each of us is struggling against the powers and that together we can create something beautiful.
I know you want to turn away. It is a hard image to see that you cannot then unsee. It will be there with you forever. Yes, that is a collapsed fruitcake. I was cooking it. You may remember that I do that to relax and get into the Christmas spirit or whatever. It is on my blog. Anyway, instead of sliding in a charming way from the loaf-pan, it exploded. A big cloud of steam engulfed both bread and baker leaving these course chunks of leathery defeat. I can keep this thing forever if I want. Like the surface of the moon, it is too inhospitable for anything to grow.
I post it today not to celebrate my defeat but because this sad scene reflects the mood of many of us as we stumble toward Christmas. We began with so many hopes and dreams. We had lists. We had goals. We told ourselves that the commercial juggernaut would not have our souls. We believed that we could in some sense responsibly react to the horrors of the news this month while also maintaining a spirit of peace, hope, love...and whatever that other stupid candle is about. You know...the pink one! Grrrrr....
Everyone in my family gets the same cold the last week of Advent. It is a tradition. As I was doping up my son today so he could go to his last day of school before break, I realized how crazy things have been. I cannot remember the last time I was home at night, for example. There have been so many things going on. Some of them were work--Pub Theology, Parish Committee, Bible Seminar--but the real kicker has been the combination of kid stuff and holiday stuff. I cannot remember a time before holiday planning. Everything points to the Christmas Eve services now.
Don't get me wrong. This is a wonderful time. However, if you are the sort of person who wants to sift through the surface crap of the season to find meaning and sustenance (and I know you are) then you are working an extra job. It is 24/7, my friends. It is a time of anticipation and preparation. This means digging deep sometimes what with all the mess and confusion of what the world throws at us. We feel that broken fruitcake, don't we.
You may have noticed that folks are a little sensitive these days. In the past week or so I have seen grown, sane, mature adults get weepy at the slightest provocation. I have seen people crack under the strain of deciding between green and red...for anything. I have colleagues who most likely don't remember quite how to get from their homes to their church even though many of them live right next door to work. Sure, some of my UU compatriots don't seem to know anything big is going on (and--brothers and sisters--you know I love you, right?) but that just makes it harder for the rest of us. This is an exciting time. This is a holy time but, dude, we are carrying quite a load right now.
Still, Christmas is a'coming. It will be great. We will give the kids their stockings and tell them not to go downstairs until we are good and ready. Then we will sleep as long as we can. We will have a big breakfast and sit around in our PJ's messaging folks on Facebook. Yes, we will celebrate the symbolic (but obviously not actual) birthday of Jesus. In fact, it will mean more for the struggle of these days. It will be wonderful. Christmas is a party after the discipline of Advent. I, at least, am looking forward to being part of that party. Twelve. Whole. Days.
I hate, I despise your festivals and I take no delight in your solemn assemblies.Even though you offer me your burnt offerings and grain offerings, I will not accept them...Take away the noise of your songs; I will not listen to the melody of your harps. But let justice roll down like waters, and righteousness like an ever-flowing stream. Amos 5:21-24
So it took me about a week of Advent to get to that moment when I decide I am going to quit my job, sell my possessions, and go live in a yurt in Vermont somewhere far, far, away from anything holiday-related. The moment happened while we were on our way back from the gingerbread house competition at the Worcester Art Museum. I am not sure what pushed me over the edge.
The gingerbread house thing used to be quite an event when it was held at the now-defunct Higgins armory. Higgins was an old factory that had been refitted to look like a 1940's idea of what a castle might be like. Think Errol Flynn and Basil Rathbone. Inside was an excellent collection of armor and weapons. It was decorated for the holiday. There were various musicians of the sort one might expect to see at one's local "Christmas Revels" performance. The entries tended to lean toward castles (how could they not?) and were done by very talented families, restaurants, and technical school culinary programs. This year--in its new location--the castles were still there but they were set up in a hallway and might as well have been kids' science experiments for all the presentation they got. Except for the promotion. The event was promoted as something...well...better.
Fortunately the trip was saved by the wonder that is the Worcester Art Museum. If you haven't been, it is worth the drive. I promise. The armor was set up in its own exhibit ("Knights!"). Also, they have a respectable permanent collection of European and American art along with a few very special pieces you will have to see for yourself. The point is, I am not sure that was what caused the funk.
More likely it was the drive in the dark and rain down Route 9 in order to get home. There are few better examples of how enforced happiness just makes us more vicious. If you live in the 'burbs (and odds are you do) you know Route 9 even if your Route 9 has a different name. There are malls and shopping centers one after the other for miles and miles. There is traffic exacerbated by awkward street lights, weird pedestrian crossings, and eccentric driving from all the people who use their animal brains to get the best deal. People come from other states to research how not to build a road. It is that bad. In December it is at its worst, because we are at our worst, too.
Anyway, I hit the ribbon candy wall. I was grabbed by the scruff of the neck and upended. I sat there in the traffic thinking about all that is going on in the world right now. We have a whole lot of problems. Yes, police militarization and entrenched racism spring right to mind these days, but do you remember immigration? How about those fraternities? Yet here we all were, on this ridiculous road on a Saturday night generally not coping well. In fact, we were engaged in another illness...rampant consumerism. My job is to point out the places where God exists in our lives and to point out the powers that keep us isolated from the Divine in ourselves, in each other, and in the world. I thought of all the places that I am able to see God and Jesus at work--some of them are truly strange--and I felt far, far from any of them.
Now, I hit that wall pretty early. However, that is probably also work-related. You see this season is something I start planning for pretty early in the year. Also, most of what I do in Advent has something to do with the holiday. There are no TP reports in the ministry, after all. Anyway, I got better because Sunday happened. We had church. I got to preach on that ancient Occupy-protester known as John the Baptizer. I talked about fruitcake. In fact, I was in a good enough mood to go to the Elm Bank Festival of Trees and check out the electric trains at the "Snow Village". Very cool.
So I don't hate Christmas today. Tomorrow, of course, I may change my mind. That is how it works sometimes. I suspect that everyone will hit the wall at least once this holiday season. The struggle for all of us is what we do when we do. For some folks it is best to step back, stop listening to carols, read a book about something else, start thinking about baseball season. Others can go all in and surrender to the craziness of it all.
For me it is always an issue of redefining the holidays. For most folks this is a secular holiday with a vaguely religious veneer. The absence of actual spiritual meaning is filled up with some pretty shallow stuff. My problem on Saturday night essentially stemmed from being confronted with the Christmas that I don't believe in. That Christmas I hate. For me this is a time when we take our spiritual beliefs (whatever they may be) and try to live into them. We try to be the sort of person we once aspired to be. We try to be the one we are called to be. All the decorations and rituals are there to remind us that life is more than what we see. That our divine connections are what are most important. Fortunately I have church to remind of this even when it isn't Christmas.
I hope your acts of redefinition are going well. I pray that you have found an Advent discipline that keeps you grounded and committed. If you need a hand, let me know. We all have times when this season starts to look like a long party that has ceased to be either interesting or relevant. If this happens to you and you want to talk. Drop me a line. You know where to find me.
So you may have seen the tag on the right of this page implying that I am doing some sort of virtual "Advent Calendar". I am. However, I am doing in on Facebook. Some days involve lengthy essays. Some days involve videos (sermons and music) and articles shared from somewhere else. The collection on this page is for columns from this blog that appear this Advent on the FB page calendar. If you want the other stuff, then it would be best to "like" BP on Facebook. I post around 7am every day during Advent. Then it gets very quiet.... Anyway, I am not hard to find. There is a link to the Facebook page on the right as well...
I went over to the coffee shop downtown today and bumped into my neighbor Rob. We got chatting about the season and--knowing that I am prone to do this sort of thing--he asked me what I am "giving up" or taking on for Advent. I told him I was struggling against my own racism. It is true, but I hate to say it. It sounds like just the thing a caricature of a liberal Christian minister would say. It sounds holier than thou. Perhaps it even appears a bit more pointed. "Look at me! I am doing minister-purification stuff! What are you up to? Just having coffee?" It is easy to tune out things like that. However, I don't feel that pure. I am a Calvinist (albeit a liberal--Universalist--one) and my racism--like many of my faults--stands out to me as a power to be fought. I first truly clued in to being a racist while I was in high school and working for the Jesse Jackson presidential campaign. It turned out that over the years of my upbringing, my whiteness (or, really, pinkness) in a white community had instilled certain assumptions within me, certain feelings, certain fears that required (and still require) my attention. I am a racist. This is how I see it. Now, neither you nor I are likely the kind of racist that immediately springs to mind. We get angry at those racists and we should. We may even feel a certain superiority. That, my friends, is the problem. Charles Blow in today's New York Times writes, "racist is the word that we must use. Racism doesn't require the presence of malice, only the presence of bias and ignorance, willful or otherwise." Liberals have biases, too. We need to remember to be vigilant. I could say that I am a "person with racism" and label it like the disease it is. However, I worry that it will let me off the hook. "Don't worry about Adam. He has racism. He can't help it." OK so...why is this struggle my Advent discipline? This year, it is hard to figure out how it wouldn't be. For work I think about Advent. I also pay attention to what is going on in the country. My days swing between these foci. Fruitcake...then Ferguson. Planning worship...then Michael Brown. Practice the Nutcracker on the ukulele...then Eric Garner, who was 43, exactly my age. How could I not be thinking about race in this country? How could I not wonder about those assumptions once again. How could I not wonder how my daily existence differs from Eric's? How could I not want to do something about it? I believe racism is a disease that can--ultimately--be cured. You need to work at it, though. Everyone has caught the bug and there is no pill. A couple years ago I was stopped by the police while walking through my neighborhood. Someone thought I looked suspicious. When closer inspection revealed my harmlessness the police wrapped up pretty darn quick. Back then I wondered what would have been different had I been someone other than Rev. Dr. Adam Tierney-Eliot, pastor of that church down the street. I kinda knew, frankly, but right now the illustration is stark. Is there hope in all this? Yes. I think there is. Many of my colleagues are reporting disagreements with people over various aspects of these cases. I am not surprised. Folks are at war with each other because they are at war within themselves. People are struggling with their own deeply embedded notions of their own goodness. I have received push back, too. However, I have also been amazed by the outpouring of anger concerning these verdicts and concerning the underlying institutions that make them possible. I am glad folks are waking up. After centuries of generally ignoring the unequal response of our society toward people of color--the historical record is embarrassingly clear--we are fighting back against our own dogmatic slumbers. It is painful but it has to be done. The trouble seems to arrive when we have to examine ourselves. Not everything is holly and ivy and mistletoe after all. The world is still ugly even when we look away. Again, why deal with race during Advent? That is easy. The Advent story is about oppression. It is about displacement. Christmas may be a party but Advent is not. Right now is the best time to take a look at that story in the Bible and to live our way way into it. The Hope of Advent isn't a hope to maintain things as they are. The Peace of Advent isn't about hushed silences, carols and hot chocolate but about equal justice. This isn't a time to ignore the violence we do but to face it. It is also time to acknowledge our own complicity and to act in the midst of our flaws. One. More. Time. This is the moment for white people--even or especially the purportedly liberal ones--to acknowledge our complicity. It is time for the white church--perhaps particularly the suburban one--to acknowledge its (our) complicity as well. This is the season of preparation for nothing less than the birth of God. Perhaps we will never be pure as individuals or as a society. However, we cannot afford to throw our hands up in despair. This holiday season it is time to fight the racism we see in our institutions and in ourselves. Let us talk. Let us march. Let us act in ways large and small before the moment is lost. Here is the article that I quote from Charles Blow.
There is an assumption I am making here. It is part of my theme for this Sunday's sermonizing. One of the great challenges we face when we try to re-claim the holiday for ourselves is the simple fact of an overblown gift culture. Simply put, Christmas has become about getting stuff you want and giving people stuff they want. As an economic engine this may have some merit. As a spiritual one, however, it makes little sense. It changes the conversation around what is important. Both adults and children grade their holiday experience based on how much loot they received. They are bothered when they don't get what they want. The people doing the giving (and, yes we are both the giver and the receiver this time of year) are quite appropriately tense about the gifts they give being accepted. This is not a healthy arrangement.
As it currently stands holiday gift giving is a test of our wealth and our love. It creates a general anxiety that makes us feed the machine, spending a great deal and then demanding the same. Instead of bringing families together, it can drive them apart. The dominant emotion on Christmas morning in many households is not joy but relief that it is over. That is too bad don't you think?
I have written about this part of the holidays a few times and no doubt will again. There are a variety of ways to get things under control. Setting a budget is one way. So is narrowing down who gets gifts in the first place. Another adaptation used for many years by parents and spouses--one that gets a bad rap--is when people buy things that need to be purchased anyway and then wrap them. Think socks. Similarly, buying your own gift (and letting him/her reciprocate) can be the perfect gift to a spouse. You get what you want. They get the satisfaction of knowing you got what you wanted without the threat of failure. Yeah, these sound silly, but, really, it frees you up to celebrate in other ways. It isn't your birthday, after all. Presents shouldn't be central.
If I am on the ball, I will provide a few updates on gifting this Advent. However, I want to start with another time honored tradition that might just make life a whole lot easier for you. Namely making gifts. They cost less. They show you thought about someone. They also let you observe the holiday in a non-commercial way while taking care of some of those pesky obligations. Here are some ideas...
Baking:
Baked goods have been the currency of the holidays since forever. They are a casual-yet-not-casual way to say that you are thinking about someone. Baking takes time. At least some of that time is spent thinking about the holiday and about the person on the receiving end of the gift. It also makes the house smell nice. You can turn on some music. There are plenty of free resources online that you can grab to figure out a new thing. Alternatively, you can go with an old classic recipe that you try to perfect over the course of years and decades. That makes it special.
Check out the previous post for that pseudo-fruitcake recipe. Cookies are also great this time of year. Here is a link to today's New York Times to get you started on cookie making. Bacon Gingersnaps anybody?
You can check out the link but don't forget to return. After all, there are plenty of people for whom baking something would be inappropriate. What will you do for them? How about...
Parties:
No, really. I am bad at throwing parties, but I love to go to them. When I am invited (whether I manage to attend or not) I see it as a gift. You can get your friends together and share the responsibilities, or you can dominate the planning yourself. Either way, you have done something special and it should count. Just let them know that is what they are getting.
Also, you can combine the party with some other low impact gift. After all, that is what the time honored "cookie swap" really is...
Making a Book: Notice I didn't say "bookmaking".
When the kids were younger, my wife and I had them make books that we could give to family and friends. The first was "A Christmahanakwanzakah Companion" (an alphabet book). The next was "The Christmas Ride of Paul Revere" which told the story of Paul Revere and his apparently inebriated sidekick William Dawes rescuing Santa from himself by delivering presents to "every Middlesex village and farm". Both involved photographs and drawings. Plenty of tape was used. Then we had it printed and bound at Staples or some similar place. It. Was. Awesome! Just as with baking, there was plenty of time to think about the holiday. Also, the kids got into it in a way that they don't when it comes to cookies.
Making a Plant Press:
This is a plant press. It got quite a bit of use during the year I was homeschooling Son #2. I did not make it. My brother's family did and gave it to us as a Christmas present. It is the sort of thing you cannot pick up at the mall. It is fun to talk about. It makes me feel like I am a 19th Century intellectual. Which is to say that it makes me feel at home.
I do not have mad skills in the making-stuff-with-wood-and-nails department. However, if you do, figure out a cool project like this. It will be worth your while. again, there are plenty of resources. You can find a plan to make pretty much anything online and there are books as well. Try something out!
Mix Tapes:
You remember mix tapes, right? I realize that technology is super-cool and whatnot. However, there was something great about the idea of somebody compiling a group of songs that they like and giving it to someone. These days you could even add an original performance or composition to the collection. I say "why the heck not?" If you do this, though, try to use a concrete medium. The web is fine and convenient. However, the holidays are old-fashioned (see "Plant Press" above). Why not be old fashioned, too?
Art in General:
Do you paint? Do you sing? Think about what other creative thing you can do. There has to be something. Use your imagination and come up with a unique gift that people will appreciate!
Final Notes:
There are two of these...
1) One note has to do with the giving. You need to be clear with people what you are doing. They need to adjust their expectations. Also, you can start gradually. Pick your hipster friends and family first. They will get it. They have probably been dying to make you a mix tape or a spinning wheel (out of tuna tins) for some time. You will make them happy. Save the difficult cases for another year when enough folks have said positive things in their presence. A good buzz like "I sure hope Adam will give us his fruitcake recipe this year. I sooo look forward to it" will help break the ice.
2) This one has to do with receiving. Son #3 asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him to make me something. He said, "I would rather get you something you would like". Heart. Broken. I thought I was doing a great job of appreciating his crafts.
We as receivers need to be helpful about what sorts of crafty things we like. We also need to be encouraging and supportive to the people who make us something. If we are not, they will go back to buying expensive crap and we will miss out on a profoundly spiritual way to address the gift giving this season.
That is all for now. Be good givers and good receivers. Like I said earlier, there are a variety of ways to go and I will try to hit a few others before we are through...
I burned the fruitcake. That is why there is this attractive picture of a snowy bush instead. I had planned a victorious photo of the first fruitcake of the season. The bush is gone thanks to re-landscaping at the parsonage but the picture remains to help console me after today's baking disaster. I am not quite bereft. But, still... Actually it isn't really a fruitcake at all but a fruit-nut bread because I see no reason to drown it in booze like you are supposed to. Also, I use fruit found in nature. Still, the bar is so low for fruitcake that when people try it they are sure it is the best fruitcake they ever tasted. Who am I to correct them? Whatever it is, I burned it pretty bad. I make a lot of these every year. It gets me in the Advent mood and then I can give them to people. This year I had some challenges that I previously didn't need to deal with. First, we have a new stove. Second, I was running around doing too many things. Third (and crucially) I misread the cooking time. Things weren't turning out right. The outside was OK but the inside was still goopy. Instead of blaming myself, I blamed the stove and turned up the heat... Anyway, you can write your own conclusion about taking time for the holidays, mindfulness and whatnot. I am too depressed. I will freeze one of the poor things and have it for breakfast later in the season. The other I will start munching tonight after I practice the Nutcracker on the ukulele for Sunday. I am sure that it will get me back in the mood... Every year when I churn these things out, some folks ask for the recipe. When not burned they are quite yummy and worth the effort. Just pay attention to those cooking times! Fruit-Nut Bread of Advent Awesomeness It should be noted that I am not a great baker. This recipe is modified from a couple of cookbooks that I usually use. One is the Better Homes and Gardens cookbook that my parents bought me when I got an apartment in college. The other is Mark Bittman's How to Cook Everything. If you know someone who does not have a copy. Get them one for Christmas. There is also a vegetarian one. This is for two loaves because no one makes just one. That is silliness. 1 stick of butter 2 cups white flour 2 cups wheat flour 2 cups sugar (a small amount (1/4-1/3 cup) of this can be brown sugar if you are a New Englander) 3 teaspoons baking powder 1 teaspoon baking soda 2 teaspoons salt 1.5 cups mulled (heated with cinnamon and cloves) apple cider (other juices in a pinch but I actually will use a strong herbal tea first and it really should be cider) 2 eggs 2 cups dried fruit 1 cup walnuts chopped About the fruit: Sure, you can use what you want, but if you asked for my recipe, the cider and the fruit are key. I use a small amount (1/4 cup) of crystallized ginger. Then I hit stuff that feels Biblical to me. I use apricots, dates, figs, cherries, blueberries, and cranberries usually. All in their dried form and then steeped in the hot cider (I also add the butter) for about 45 minutes. The steeping gives them enough time to mingle and then cool before adding the eggs, which you do not want to cook too early. The rest is easy, put the dries in the liquids. Stir gently until it is a sticky mess. You might need a teensy bit more cider. Put it in the loaf pan and... Cook it at 350 Fahrenheit for 1 hour! Don't make the same mistake I did... There ya go, my Advent gift to you. By the way, I am now eating the pseudo fruitcake and the middles are fine...
According to my FB feed I should already be getting myself into my annual state of XMas rage. I should be mad at Fox News for their pretend "War on Christmas" (I am). I should be angry at retailers being open on Thanksgiving (I am). I should be annoyed about the general commercialism of "the Holidays" (of course I am). I should also point out that it isn't really that important a holiday in the Christian calendar anyway (duh...obviously). Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday in the world. Ever. Easter comes in second. I so get it. This run of holidays beginning with Halloween, reaching its peak with XMas and coasting to a stop around New Year's (for the unchurched) and Epiphany (for the rest of us) is a bit of a chore. It's all about hype and money and whatnot.
However--ministers--could I just direct you to something important? For many of the people in your community (not necessarily your congregation, but the community at large) this is the only time they think about all those things we think about the rest of the year. I mean in a focused way. This means while we are grinching our way along, we are getting killed by the secular culture and the religious right. They speak the language that others speak rather than speaking thier own language slowly, expecting folks to understand.
The season starts (as I mentioned) on Halloween when we think about fear and death. Then there is Thanksgiving which is about gratitude, family and so on. Then there is XMas which is about presents (if you let it be) or about something so much more. That "something" though, is hard to articulate if we don't think about it until it is upon us. You know those fellow humans who aren't darkening your doors on Sunday; the ones at sports, the ones at work, the ones with the New York Times who think they are just a bit too cool for school? Something happens to them this time of year. They feel an urge that they cannot quite place.
Now, we might call this urge the "movement of the Spirit," or "God," or "The Divine," or "The Great Whatever". They call it "Christmas Spirit". That is their word. It is what they have and they want to know more. That is why they suddenly show up around this time of year. To reach them we have to speak the language they know, not beat them about the head and shoulders with our purity. Then, if we can do speak in a way that respects their humanity, we can broaden their vocabulary. We can talk about the Jesus of Faith, Hope, Peace, and Love. We can talk about Justice and all those good things that they may think about, but don't get to think about systematically the rest of the year. Maybe they might even like church and visit us again.
This is important, grouchy pastors. We are being tuned out because we often speak a language of arrogance and exceptionalism. We correct people. We judge them. They are trying to get some of what we say we have and instead of support or direction they are getting guff. They aren't shopping the right way. They like to listen to carols in November. Their turkey isn't organically fed love maggots and tickled to death. That is what they hear, anyway, and we are paying the price. In our churches we pay. In our nation we pay. Since some of us woke up this morning to find a post-election disaster, I think it is clear that the message that we declare from our pulpits isn't getting too far out our doors. If you do not meet people where they are, they won't listen to you.
What I am NOT suggesting here is that we join the throng at Wal-Mart on Thanksgiving night! What I do suggest is that we take a moment to think about how we can--using the "pulpits" that are least ignored during this time--provide some counter-mojo that affirms those seekers we are turning off. I am serious. "God" to many people means getting to buy stuff and say "Merry Christmas" to whoever you darn well please. It is a way to channel our anger into what should be a happy and glorious occasion. Seems pretty shallow to me. We offer a deeper God, one that calls us to serve something greater than ourselves. How do we get that message through? How do we get people to listen? Probably not by yelling.
Anyway, I have already begun planning for the holidays. Since I see it as a single piece with many "movements", I started October 1 getting ready for Halloween. I will try to share stuff with you if I find something that makes sense. Worship planning is a great place to start. After all, this is the time when you never know who might go to church...
Here are my past "shopping tips". One thing that might help (I have usually failed) is to clear the deck of this sort of obligation so you can focus on the spiritual work at hand during Advent. Which to say, you can actually spend time being religious, yourself.
When last we left each other I had done my best to break down some of the "first things" of uke purchases. We talked about where to buy, what to look for, and a few other details to help keep you informed. Now I would like to take a look at some of the ukes I have either owned or played and why I chose them.
I will still speak in generalities to a certain extent. The reason, quite simply, is that you are somewhat stuck with whatever there is in the local area. Also, any company I mention here will be one that I think is worth looking at. I don't want any confusion.
Finally, a disclaimer: I am not a professional. I am--at best--an enthusiastic amateur of average gifts. What I am saying here, then, is from that perspective. If you want a pro, look somewhere else.
Concerns About Price (Not Really):
One of the great things about the ukulele is that it is small, simple, and--in its bones--a folk instrument. Few people make their careers on the thing. Playing one well does not give the kids a leg up getting into college. It is for fun. It is for expression of feeling. It can be a window into your soul and an avenue toward a new language of personal expression and communication. Fortunately, none of that is easy to monetize and you can buy a uke for much less than a comparable guitar.
This is my way of saying that you need not worry too much about cost and shouldn't look at price at the clearest indicator of quality. You can purchase--and I have purchased--a good quality instrument for less than $100 and a serviceable one for half that. For a little more money there are plenty of options to help you make the sound you want to make.
Here I am going to make a general rule about size, quality, and cost which has more than a few exceptions but is also true in many if not most cases: the best "quality" for your dollar will be found in the smaller uke sizes. Which is to say--hypothetically--a soprano ukulele that was as good in build and tone as a $200-$250 acoustic guitar may cost less than half that. A concert may cost slightly more than half and a tenor slightly more than that. A similar Baritone may be only $20-$50 less. this is not to say that you shouldn't get a concert or a tenor (baritones are a special case which I discussed in Part I) because a) there are exceptions and b) that may be the size that looks, feels and sounds best to you. Here I am really just talking about certain qualities. Others may outweigh them.
After all, even though this fact has been general knowledge for some time people still buy guitars. We have a few in the parsonage, obviously, and a few other sorts of instruments as well.
A Brief Departure Into Makers:
This is the perfect place to mention a few makers. Some of the big "name" guitar companies make ukuleles. I recently played a cute Gibson soprano with an internal pick-up. Also, Martin has a long history with the uke. High end luthiers like Collings make them too. These are great. However, some of these are very expensive and really for pros and collectors. Others --like the Gibson--are probably a bit overpriced as you are buying a name. It is best at this point to stick to outfits who make the ukulele as their primary product.
Now, there are some truly great ukulele makers. Kamaka is probably the most famous. However, I am only going to talk about companies whose instruments I have played and that also make good starter and "second" or "third" ukuleles. Which is to say that they can all be acquired for less than, say, $300. Some (obviously) can be had for much less...
When looking for a quality inexpensive ukulele of any size, it is worth gravitating toward two brands: Kala and Lanikai. While they have slightly different approaches and products lines, they are in most respects similar. The founder of Kala worked for Lanikai before moving on, for example, and they both produce good products in our budget range. Makala is just a cheaper Kala. Mahalo is just a name on a toy uke. I tend to play Kala's more than Lanikai. The biggest reason is that my local music store carries Kalas, but I have to say that they have been pretty darn good. I was over there today checking things out and found a great many factory seconds that sounded fantastic...
OK so, I am going to go vaguely based on size and the first category is...
Sopranos That Are Also Toys:
The fact is, there are many people who want to buy a ukulele for a child or adult who never really expect much playing to be done on it. This isn't always a bad thing. They can be used as souvenirs or decorations, or part of a Halloween Costume (though I ask you to keep the costumes appropriate and sensitive the culture that produced the uke). The "toy" ukes (almost all sopranos or soprano-like) can be a bit embarrassing to actual players. Their presence, after all, is why the instrument isn't taken seriously or respected. They can, after all, be serious fun but there is no reason to buy garbage.
So I present you with the Mahalo soprano uke. It is made basically out of actual plywood and many, many coats of shiny paint. It is also sufficient for a starter uke for a child. My seven year old has one and he knows how to play it, bringing it to lessons every week. With these cheap instruments, though, it is important to check the action (the distance between the strings and the fretboard) to make sure it isn't too high. Kids need to build up their finger muscles and if we make it too hard to press down, they will stop playing.
Also in this category and even cuter is the Makala "Dolphin Uke". This is also a soprano. It is made of plastic and is the one I take with me if I have to go on an airplane. I have a very detailed description of it as it won the coveted "Ukulele of the Year" award from Burbania Posts last year. I will link to that review at the end. In general, I would take the Makala over the Mahalo if you can find one. their durability is excellent and (once you change the strings to new polycarbons as I recommended in Part I) the sound is surprisingly spritely!
An old man playing the Makala Dolphin Uke on a summer afternoon
Sopranos That Are Not Toys:
There are plenty of these. Soprano ukuleles are prized for their traditional sound and the general sense of fun. All ukes make people smile. However, when you pull out a soprano they smile the widest. I know, I have taken mine to nursing homes and there is a truly pastoral dimension to the instrument. Also, they are good for beginners. In fact, all ukulele players of any skill level should have access to one. The example I have here is a Kala long-necked soprano. Yes, it is mine. My twelve-year-old likes to play it. The action is good. It has a sweet tone, and it has a wood-laminate body. In fact, this one may very well have been getting the most use lately. It can be purchased new for under $80. They also have a slightly more expensive solid-wood version of this. The sound is fantastic and if you want to worry about hydration (it needs a humidifier, which you can ask for at any music store) it may be worth a few extra bucks. In fact a certain young man may be finding one (a second) under the tree so I can have this one back!
Kala Mahogany Long Neck Glossy (front). This is the prettiest uke in our collection.
Concerts:
Both Kala and Lanikai have an abundance of these in different woods and finishes. They range in price from about $120 to much, much more. However, you can get a good one for under $200. Some of these have electric pick-ups. I do not have any that do (though I have played them). Electronics is a matter of choice. My personal feeling is that unless you need it for jamming with louder instruments (like a guitar, banjo, mandolin, etc) or if you plan on performing in a very large room, it might make sense to take that money and invest it in a an instrument that is better in other ways. If you are going to do those things, however, then you are investing in a slightly better uke...for you!
Kala and Lanikai--while they are based in the US--do most of their manufacture overseas. My sense (from some limited research but by no means exhaustive) is that they are responsible corporate citizens. By moving construction offshore they are able to keep their costs down. Most US-made instruments I have encountered are rather expensive and if I was able to afford them I would buy them exclusively...but I can't. This brings us to another company that produces their ukes right here in New England. Flea Market Music or The Magic Fluke Company produce quality instruments that sound much better than what you pay for. However, they look a bit odd, which may upset your traditionalist gene. I have played their soprano (the "Flea") and I own a basic model of their concert size (the "Fluke"). They have a rich tone all their own, which is thanks in part to their mostly-plastic bodies. The neck is wood and the front is wood-laminate.
An arty angle on the Fluke. The top picture is of the same instrument.
I have reviewed the Fluke elsewhere in this blog and will post the review at the end. I actually encourage you (contrary to what I have written before) to order this online and to customize it. If you are comfortable with the non-traditional look, then you should be as non-traditional as you like! The one I have is currently listed (new) at around $200. I would buy it again. I would, however, spent the extra $40 or so to upgrade the fretboard. The one in the picture (mine) is plastic, which works fine for everyday use. However, a wooden fretboard would enable one to occasionally use a wound string for the lowest note (wound strings would wear down the plastic frets). Also, maybe a funkier color would be nice. The one I have matches my boring clericals...
Tenor:
What I have written about the concert counts here as well. In fact, Fluke (whose body is a bit large for a concert) does have a tenor-neck option. The instrument I am most familiar with in this category, however, is my son's Kala. It is a factory second and cost us under $200. This one does have an internal pick-up which enables him to play runs and such while working with the rest of the Ukestra...or just with his father as in this video here. I, for the record, am playing the long-neck soprano. Here we are rehearsing for a piece we did in church. Try to concentrate on the separate sounds of the two ukes...
OK So... That is it! Good hunting. I hope this helps. Most of these web pages and brands can be found through the simple process of googling. However, I am listing the two ukulele reviews below...
Makala Dolphin Uke As I re-read it, this isn't much of a review, but there is some good advice so I link anyway. I should note, however, that anything I wrote in the Christmas Guide should supersede any conflict in the previous post. I have learned a lot since then and my thinking on ukes has changed somewhat.
I have been getting a whole lot of questions about ukes lately from kids, adults, and adults thinking about their kids. It makes sense, I think, to write my advice down at this point. It is what any responsible ukulele-toting pastor would do....
Where do I go?
First, to make a good purchase, you need a good place to look. Musical instruments are not the best things to buy online. Sometimes this cannot be helped and--with research--you can still make a quality purchase. Still, what sounds good to one person may sound horrible to someone else. Even the same make and model can sound, look, and feel different. Ideally you would go to a local music store that has many (new and used) stringed folk instruments on the wall. Yes, that means mostly guitars (electric and acoustic) and bass guitars with the occasional banjo and mando thrown in. They will know their ukes.
Stores that sell band instruments often will have a few entry-level ukuleles that are just barely rising over the "toy" level that haunts players everywhere. Many of these are good, but ukes are popular now. If your teen has asked for one, they are probably not thinking of something like this. They want something classy. Guitar Center and other "instrument malls" are also best thought of as a last resort. They are OK, particularly if you have done a lot of research, but the helpers don't always know much past the basics, particularly since you are not interested in an electric guitar. Also, I know that places like Best Buy and Barnes and Noble will have "Kits" with an instrument and perhaps a book. Avoid these...really...
The key issue, however, is to not be afraid! If you are not someone who has spent time around instruments and music stores, you might worry about appearing stupid, getting ripped off, or just feeling out of place. Honestly, don't worry too much about these things. Most of the dudes and dudettes who work at the stores are really nice. They have a passion for music and they want to share it, even if they are a lot younger (or older) and hipper (always hipper) than you.
What do I need to know?
Good question! Know the basics, of course... Size: There are four ukulele sizes that you should be thinking about and will encounter in your average store. There are others and some combinations of sizes, but that is fairly advanced so think four and adapt on the fly if necessary. Remember, none of these are very large! They are all smaller than your average-sized guitar...
The soprano (or standard) is the traditional one. They are bright and festive and charming. Most of the "toys" are in this category because they are smaller and therefore cheaper to make. Still, some of the best and most classic ukes fall into this category. They are portable, practical, economical and--getting away from the toys but not spending too much more--beautiful to see and hear. I have four sopranos and through my kids own two more. The one that keeps me company in the office and when I travel is a soprano. The one I find myself picking up the most often at home is a soprano long-neck (one of those hybrids, more later)...
In fact, all "long neck" means is that the neck is from a uke one size up! In this case the concert. The intergenerational Eliot Church Ukestra to which I belong (as pastor and member) has a love affair with the concert. The neck is bigger (more range, somewhat easier to play). It is a bit louder. The sound is also a tad mellower and (I find) somewhat more round. The purpose of the instrument is right there in its name! These positive traits can outweigh the loss of charming uke-sound in certain situations. I play a concert uke in the Ukestra. It has seen a whole lot of action.
Next up is the Tenor. This somewhat larger instrument is tuned the same way as the other two (gCEA). That "g" is not a typo. This is called "re-entrant tuning" and the g is tuned one octave higher than the other strings. Hum to yourself the famous tune "My Dog Has Fleas". There yah go. Uke tuning. Now, I say this, but some of my ukes have other tunings and it is common to find tenors and concerts tuned with a low "G" as well.
The tenor has a fuller, richer sound (usually) and, again, a larger neck. Many of the pros use this size because of greater range of notes available. Jake Shimabukuro uses one that you cannot afford. The same is true for Eddie Vedder, though he has played a variety of sizes in concert. My son plays the tenor in the Ukestra. We have one more in the band as well. Again, it is about what you like. The biggest difference is the sound they make.
Finally a note about the Baritone. This graceful instrument is tuned like the four highest strings of a guitar. I like them a lot though I do not own one or play one frequently. I think they add something special to songs that a guitar does not. However, they are for specific functions. We do have one in the Ukestra and it is important to our sound. My recommendation is NOT to buy one as a first ukulele. If you think you should buy one because you already play guitar, don't. You are buying a guitar with fewer strings. If you think you are buying one so you or someone you love can learn to play the guitar, don't. Respect the Bari and buy a small guitar.
Strings: OK...so the best kept "secret" about the ukulele is that the greatest influence on sound comes from the strings. This is particularly true for the smaller models and is less true going up in size. Yes, the wood, plastic (not always a bad thing) or plastic/wood bodies do influence the sound, but because they are so small a good set of strings will influence the experience a great deal. Here is my first actual purchase recommendation: Get new strings with the uke. For concert-size and up I am a fan of Aquila Nylgut strings. For the "true" (not long-neck) sopranos, I suggest Martin Polycarbon strings. These can be ordered online.
I should say that the strings are a matter of personal taste. The Martin polycarbons are a bit brighter which sounds "thin" to me on a larger uke but just right on a soprano. That said, my son has Martins on his Tenor. The Aquila strings are "fatter" sounding and help to fill it out. Be sure--whichever you choose--to purchase the right size for the uke. Uke first, then strings.
Body: Some ukes are plastic. Most of these are junk. However, some of them are brilliant. I have two ukes that are made entirely or in part out of plastic. Play them and see what you think!
Other ukes (most even) are made out of wood, but that wood can be some form of press-board in the toys. It can be laminate (plywood) or it can be solid wood. Now, I am assuming you know little about these things and you are looking at purchasing your first "serious" uke. In my opinion there is no real reason to get a solid wood instrument at this time. There are great laminate instruments that sound as good as (sometime better than) the solids. Go with a laminate or a good plastic model. Do not get pressured into buying more ukulele than you actually want!
Now, in all honesty, I covet a couple of solid wood instruments (made by Pono) just outside my price-range. Someday they may not be and I will not hesitate to try to convince my wife I need one. The wood is part of the reason for the quality of their sound and I can envision myself using an instrument like this in my ministry. However, laminates sound great and are not nearly as finicky. I have a solid wood Mandolin and sometimes I feel like I am caring for a bonsai tree. I worry if it has enough water. I worry if it is too cold or two hot. My ukes don't treat me that way and I love them for it.
Final Body Note: Those hybrids I mentioned earlier? They get even more elaborate than different neck-sizes. The ones that are particularly trendy right now are the banjo-ukes and the resonator-ukes. In both cases, those aren't what you are looking for in a first good ukulele. Like the Baritone, they have a place and time but you will want to figure out if they possess a sound you want. The one exception may be British people who recall the banjo-uke work of George Formby.
Tomorrow: So this is a lot to take in, isn't it? Also, much of what I have written isn't all that specific. This is not the worst thing. If you are in a rush, you might just want to read this and go out into the marketplace to see what you can find. However, tomorrow I will make some specific product recommendations that may help. For an amateur, I have gotten a chance to play a whole lot and a whole of different instruments. I am blessed in this way and will make sure to pass along some ideas and directions.
Until then, check out the Ukestra Christmas Video Card!
For the record: you are listening to 1 Baritone, 2 Tenors, and 4 Concerts. One (mine) is a plastic/laminate hybrid. The others are all very pretty plywood. The strings are by choice but mostly some form of polycarbon. They all have re-entrant tunings except one of the concerts and the Baritone. So there ya go! A great combination...
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